Posts Tagged ‘machete’

Z60The Government has recently allocated several million in advertising and funds to sponsor the Z 60 program. It is my understanding that they recommend that both children and adults train for 60 minutes a day on killing ZOMBIES. This will not only help fight the obesity epidemic in America, but will allow for us as a nation to be prepared for any such outbreak. So be on the lookout in the mail for your vouchers to claim a machete and gas mask, compliments of good old Uncle Sam. The mandatory Z- Defense courses should start this spring down at the local Y, and if you are physically unable to participate (PUP) they have decided to move such people to the Z-CHUM camps, or the Z-BAIT stations. All necessary pamphlets and information will be included when you receive the voucher packet.

BREAKING NEWS: MR. RICHARD SIMMONS WILL BE THE SPOKESPERSON FOR Z 60